Two Cents

Death With Dignity
Windows vs Mac
Is Energy Real?
Mitt Romney's Profile in Courage
Health Tips
My Prius
The Marines
Prostitution's Covergirl
Wisdom: Hax, Pitts & Sivers
A Gay Wedding
Bathroom Laws
Smoking

 

A Gay Wedding

I remember the first time I saw a couple of guys walking down the street holding hands, it seemed a little strange. Then one day I overheard a gay fellow talking about falling in love. And he sounded remarkably like all the rest of us when we fall in love. That was forty years ago. Since then I've had gay friends and gay employees and done square dancing at the gay square dance club, and I've come to a conclusion. Gay people are remarkably like all the rest of us. They have this one deviation from the norm, but in other ways it's astonishing how average they are. They love sports and music, they're athletes and accountants, they're smart and they're dumb. They're amazingly normal. Except that's not quite right, it's not a huge difference, but on average I would say they're slightly kinder than all the rest of us.

I've noticed that the vaste majority of us have some slight deviation from the norm. Some part of us that's a little slanted. And we need to forgive ourselves and each other for not being completely normal. And we need to get over the fact that gay people aren't exactly like us. So what. It's such a small portion of our lives. It ain't that big a deal. Nowadays, when I see a gay couple holding hands, I'm not sure I even notice. It's just life.

So should gay people be able to get married? Not according to the Bible. And the Bible is the direct word of God. Boy, it's hard to argue against that sort of reasoning. According the the Bible it's an abomination. So here's a few things the Bible also describes as abominations: Lobsters, shrimp, clams, octopus and squids; Four-legged fowls; Four-footed flying, creeping things; Whatever crawls on its belly, goes on all four, or has lots of legs; Sacrificing a blemished sheep or goat; Women who wear men's clothing; Men who wear women's clothing; The hire of a whore or the price of a dog; Taking back an ex-wife after she's been defiled; Any man that maketh any graven or molten image; That which is highly esteemed among men. Are you as confused as I am?

Should the fact that descriminating against gays is unkind matter? Shouldn't we be trying to live kind lives? Isn't that what matters and what we ought to use as our guiding light? There are passages in the Bible that make God sound like the cruellest monster that ever lived. Are you sure you want to take every single blessed word in there as the word of God?

Put it another way, should your religious beliefs be enough to deny people their rights? Should it be our government's responsibility to descriminate against people because your religion says so. What if somebody else's religion says you should be descriminated against. Would that be fair?

A wedding has two parts to it. A religious ceremony and a legal document provided by the state. If your religion wants to deny gay people the right to marry in your church, I figure that's your business. The gay couple can always go find a more inclusive church. But that legal document controlled by the state and creating protections for the members of a family if things should go south, that contract should be available to everyone. It's not the state's place to be denying the rights that all others enjoy.

And finally, will your life and your marriage be truly impacted if there's a gay couple across town getting married today. I don't see it. People talk about it making us an immoral society. Gay people are going to love each other no matter whether we let them marry or not. If you think there's a god up above working himself into a wrathful lather because his creatures are acting on the desires in the DNA he gave them. Then I'm at a loss as to how to convince you otherwise. But surely our allowing gay people to live out their lives just like the rest of us imperfect souls doesn't destroy anything. I don't see society crumbling. I don't see the downside.

I was at a gay wedding recently. Two women I'm fond of. It was lovely. Two people wanting to live their lives together. Nice. Having a partner in life is a wonderful thing.

An update to these thoughts. The Supreme Court has spoken. Things are changing fast. Popular sentiment has shifted enormously in the last ten years. And the reason things are changing is because gay people found the courage to come out. A gay couple moved in next door to us last fall. Regular folk. I'm enjoying having them as neighbors. They invited the neighborhood over last week to watch a movie out in the yard at night. A fun idea.

All over the country, as people have come out of the closet, the realization has been setting in, Oh! George is gay? I never would have guessed. George has always seemed like a nice guy. Well, what the heck. So congratulations to all the people who created the change by standing up for themselves. It was never easy. It took some serious courage. Really, well done.