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North Carolina's Transgender Bathroom Law

Some are complaining that North Carolina's transgender bathroom law is unenforceable. That's nonsense. It's really simple. Everyone just needs to carry around a copy of their birth certificate, and you need a cop at the door of the bathroom to check it. Problem solved. (Though you'd better look out for birth certificate forgeries.)

I do worry about the ladies of North Carolina being flustered when a man shows up in their bathroom. But they'll need to keep in mind that despite the fact that he's now a man, he was born a woman and all the testosterone shots in the world don't change that.

I also worry about a transgender woman in the men's room feeling a little weird and out of place among the men. But they're just going to have to...  I don't know, maybe they could develop extraordinary bladder control and avoid the whole problem.

Isn't it odd that we fight these wars with our bathrooms. There was a time, not so long ago, when black people couldn't use the bathroom. Sometimes they could find a bathroom designated for "coloreds," but if not they'd either run out in the alley or have an accident when they couldn't hold it in anymore. Imagine yourself in a public place and the only bathroom is for white's only. You finally can't hold back, and your pants are soaked, and you're standing in your own urine. There's a cruelty to this.

Does any of this seem a little silly to you? This is a law that will never be enforced. And people wouldn't like it if it were enforced. There's a trend in this country towards breaking down barriers, of trying to treat all people as equal and worthy of respect. It means women can vote and black people can marry white people and women can serve in the military and gay people can marry gay people and transgender people can use the bathroom.

And there are some who feel we're going to far. And they want to fight back. So they came up with a bathroom law. And the trouble is, it really is one of the stupidest things I've ever heard of. So a kindly word of advice to the state's elected officials. If you want to fight this, I guess that's your business. But don't do things that make you look like morons.